Do you have a nightly routine?
42% don’t follow any routine, 39% follow theirs to a T, 15% lie awake in bed wondering why they’re not sleeping yet, and 4% turn off all screens by 8:00 (so disciplined!).
What’s your ideal sleeping situation?
64% chose a king-size bed in a luxury hotel, 20% chose the soft sand on the beach, a warm breeze rocking them to sleep (warning: grit in bad places), 10% could sleep on a bed of rocks if they had to, and 6% were adventurous, choosing a tent in the wilderness.
Some answers we liked:
Gentle rain Somewhere snuggly My recliner I actually DO sleep in a tent in the wilderness every night At home with my dogs Cool nights and no worries
What’s your favorite synonym for sleep?
Coma Glorious repose Feeling human Dead to the world Pass the f*ck out Peace Pee time! Dreamboat on the river of life in the dark Fall into the arms of Morpheus Horizontal unconsciousness My husband and I call it Cuddle University Get flat and check out Nappy naps
What’s the funniest thing you’ve heard someone say in their sleep?
“Boo—I’m a ghost—boo, boo, boo, boo, boo” (whispered in my ear by my dear, dreaming husband) “Get the eggs, we gotta get out of here” “I’m not running for president. I’m walking the dog” “Go and wash your dolls’ toes” “Put the baseball bat in the refrigerator” My husband saying “bring on the dessert!” in a Julia Child imitation voice followed by a Julia-like laugh! “Are you god?” “Clowns!!!” “He took my toes!” “I can fart louder than you” I said, “Jump ball dildo” “I need the butter, man!”
How often do you remember your dreams?
What’s the best dream you’ve ever had?
Watching Miles Davis play in São Paulo, Brazil Feelin’ financially secure I was taking a bath and small suns and moons were in the water with me That I quit my job to become an artist Having sex with Tom Cruise I was the ruler of a great kingdom Flying and being in a cozy mystical cottage in the forest I dreamt that John Lennon kissed me on a beach Performing surgery on a squirrel I found in my driveway. Not sure if the little guy made it! My mother was alive and holding my hand
What’s the silliest dream you’ve had?
Trying to save my purse in a tornado Hitler was trying to kill me… That wasn’t so much silly as it was utterly intensely terrifying I was a flying eraser I was married to my cat Winning an air guitar competition Bigfoot was a NASA astronaut Aliens had chosen me to be their spokesperson A killer toaster trying to get me
