What Wives Wish Their Husbands Knew
We love that The Dating Divas can be a source to help strengthen marriage, but we love being able to use YOU (our dear readers!) to help us strengthen our marriages too! As we read through all the survey responses, it was clear that there were some very specific points you wanted to share with your husbands! We narrowed it down to the top 10 things that a wife wants from her husband and included your specific thoughts! As you read through these thoughts (whether a wife or husband) consider what else you haven’t told your spouse recently – do any of these match?!
10. I appreciate YOU!
What a wife wants from her husband is for him to know how much she appreciates him!
I wish my husband really knew how much I appreciate everything he does. I know that sometimes he comes home and I’ve had an exhausting day with the kids and I don’t show my appreciation for his hard work as much as I should. Really, I want him to know how I truly appreciate him for EVERYTHING – from providing for our little family to helping me with dishes, to dealing with me being super needy sometimes {and probably quite demanding}, to leaving me little notes to find to make my day. I love and appreciate all that he does for our kids! He is such a good father! I don’t think words or cards could ever show how much I appreciate him and all he does for our family!
9. What you say affects me deeply.
What a wife wants from her husband is that his words matter and the things he says stay with her–for good or for bad.
I forget most of the reasons for our arguments but NEVER the things he has said to me during our disagreements. Jokes at my expense in front of others are never funny. I know he loves me, he has never and would never cheat on me, I’ve never doubted that, but lies can make you doubt so many things… Especially such petty, little lies. I wish my husband knew… That the “I am sorry” doesn’t mean the same thing when you always say it for doing the exact same thing over and over.
8. I want to be romanced.
What the wife wants from her husband is to feel special and that the spark is still there!
Small, thoughtful acts of romance go a long way! Running a bath for me, making dinner, a little gift, a flower — all say, “I’m thinking about you.” A little romance and thoughtfulness go a long way! I wish my husband knew: I am much more likely to be intimate with him if he were to work on getting me in the mood throughout the day instead of just touching me right before we hop into bed! I love my husband, and I desire him, but texts, phone calls, make-out sessions (prior to the start of sex) and just talking about it with me would turn me on and prepare me for our time together that evening! His kisses and his words mean everything to me! I wish he knew that I want him to be more intimate and not just sexual.
7. Little things are actually BIG things to me.
What the wife wants from her husband is that the little things are what makes the relationship great.
I wish he knew how important to me the small things were. Small things such as cleaning the house, making dinner, doing things on my “honey-do” list, etc. I’m not talking every night, but occasionally would be nice. Doing things for me should be a joy, not an obligation. Sometimes it feels like he HAS to do things for me, not doing it because he wants to. Most of the time he does what I ask – not when I ask him, but when it is convenient for him. What he says & does (or does not say & do) carries far more weight than he realizes. When he says he will do something, and then does not follow through, he is communicating to me that I am unimportant to him. If I ask him to do something and he said he would, but doesn’t, he is telling me I am not a priority in his life. When I ask him to do something, I don’t mean for him to do it a week later whenever he feels up to it. Realistically, I’d love for him to do it right then or as soon as possible. When he asks me to do something, he expects it to get done immediately and I would just appreciate the same consideration for the things I feel are important. Help out around the house more with little things. He can show me love by completing a task that he knows I hate, by surprising me with a mid-afternoon text just to check in, or by simply just holding me close and taking time after a long day to be with me while I make supper.
6. You are important.
What a wife wants from her husband is for him to recognize that she is spread thin, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t the most important.
I wish that my husband knew that he is the most important – out of everything in this world – and I would do anything for him. I wish he knew how IMPORTANT he is. The world doesn’t give men a lot of credit, but no matter what the media says, we NEED good fathers and husbands. He is amazing and I honestly don’t know how I would function or stay sane without him. He’s my hero! He is the most important person to me. I will do anything to help him and make his life as great as he has made mine.
5. I want to act like we are dating again.
What the wife wants from her husband is for him to bring back the fun, excitement, and playfulness of the dating days!
I also wish he would know that I am longing for his funny flirts. Secretly, I wish that he would bring me home flowers just because, not just for a special occasion. They don’t have to be expensive, just a $15 bouquet from Costco. A single red rose would make me thrilled. He used to do that when we were dating and that doesn’t happen anymore. I still like dating you – don’t forget that. Treat me like you’re still trying to win me over. I wish that he would initiate date night more and that he would surprise me with a babysitter and a night out with him. I’d love to not plan, cook, or organize anything. I do a lot of all of that in my day-to-day and sometimes a girl just needs to feel swept off her feet.
4. I need to be told I’m beautiful.
What a wife wants from her husband is meaningful compliments to make her feel special and seen by him.
I want to be thought of as beautiful, not hot. That I need him to tell me I am beautiful. Whether I am dressed up to go out, in my “at home” clothes, sick in bed, or naked in bed. There is no one I want to look beautiful for more. And hearing that he still believes I am beautiful, after 10+ years and 20+ pounds, even when {especially when!} I am looking my ugliest, which makes me feel like the most secure wife and most confident woman out there. We can be very insecure being only in our skin – I am insecure about my weight and appearance. I need to be reminded he still loves me, even though I’m tired and cranky. I need to be reminded he still finds me sexy. Even though my jeans are a little too tight in the wrong places and my “mommy body” is a little saggy. and my hair may or may not have been washed in the last 3 days I want to hear it! Pay attention and comment when it’s obvious I’ve put in the extra effort!
3. Listening is more than hearing.
What the wife wants from her husband is to feel heard and have her feelings validated.
Listening is about more than hearing: it’s actually being attentive, actively paying attention, and remembering what I said. Being observant is essential. I wish my hubby knew how important it is for me to have time to just talk and chat. We always talk about our days at dinner and the usual, but I love connecting in deeper ways when we have pillow talk or something about our memories, hopes, dreams, etc. I don’t think he knows how much I need and enjoy that! Sometimes I don’t want him to fix it, just listen to me talk about it. {You have to watch this video to get a laugh about this really real issue, haha}
2. I am proud of you.
What the wife wants from her husband is for him to see himself through her eyes.
I wish my husband knew how proud I am of him. That I am SO very proud of him and how hard he works for our family! I KNOW that I don’t tell him this often enough! My husband is basically my bragging rights at any party. He’s not the “normal” husband, and that’s why I’m so proud of him!
1. I LOVE YOU!
What a wife wants from her husband is for him to know, above all else, that he is so loved.
I truly love him and support him 100%. He is everything to me, but I don’t express it often or well. I love him, just the way he is. I want my husband to know that when I look at him, I see the most amazing, smart, funny, man alive! That is why I love him so much! That is why I always want him to reach for the stars…because I see so much potential in him! People love him for who he is and don’t judge him by his shortcomings – and neither do I! How much I love him. Every day to-dos clutter our love. I don’t want words of anger to replace the love he knows I have for him.
What Do Women Want from Their Husbands
Husbands, did you get that?! We LOVE you and we genuinely want the best for you and for our marriages. If you are interested in more of this topic be sure to check out For Men Only, or What Wives Wish Their Husbands Knew About Women. Wives, if you were wondering what your husband might be thinking, we can answer that! Our post 10 Things Husbands Wish Their Wives Knew really opened up our eyes to what our husbands are thinking. And if you are feeling like you need to delve even deeper, check out 5 Things Husbands Wish Their Wives Knew About Sex and What Wives Wish Their Husbands Knew About Sex.
